Christmas Game

While Archer was at Grandma Sue's for a sleepover Shelly and I played a game that she called the Christmas Game. I guess she called it this because its around Christmas time? It started out as tag. That girl can RUN! And when racing around the kitchen/dining room/living room there's no way I can catch her. We took turns being "it" and when that got old I flopped down on the floor and we played rocket launch. Which evolved into rocket repair, robots repairing rockets and robots capturing each other. The running and laughing and generally being silly together compares to nothing. No vacation, no movie or other entertainment, nothing compares to the fun of being silly with a three year old. Or any age kid. I don't even have to be the creative one if I'm just willing to go along with whatever they make up. Nothing compares to spending pure undistracted time with my kids, my family.

Christmas Road Trip - Part 2

The next morning we traveled the rest of the way to see Great-Grandma & Great-Grandpa Gruenberg and again had a fantastic afternoon. And again the kids only lasted so long before they had to go outside to explore the snowy landscape. And of course they came in wet, they hadn't even worn their boots this time so Archer went for the rest of the day with no socks. That'll teach him to walk in the snow without boots on... or not, I'm sure he won't remember next time ;-)


After great stories, great food and a little bit of playtime it was time to make the long drive home. Five hours later we made it. To Mom and Dad's. We had to make a pit stop there and ended up staying for two and a half hours! Shelly was SO wound up and Archer was SO tired and little Eli was SO sick of riding in the car and it was SO LATE at night... Finally we left, minus one kid (she decided she just couldn't go any further in the car so we left her behind) and encountered a deer in Mom and Dad's driveway (the adventures never end!). A four hour drive took us about eight with the stops along the way and when we were finally home last night it seemed as if we'd been gone for a week.

I'm again amazed at the blessings we have in our lives, the people who are part of our family and the joy in sharing our lives with them. And I'm again reminded that we have to slow down to see the gifts that God has given us, take the time to share stories and laughter and memories.

For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
~Matthew 6:21

Christmas Road Trip - Part 1

After Christmas Day with David's family and the next day with my family we were just getting started. It feels like we crammed two months worth of fun into five days and it was AWESOME!

Our road trip to Argyle began on Monday morning - we tried to get out the door by 8 but actually pulled out of the driveway 40 minutes after that, not too bad! We arrived at Great-Grandpa Holmes' house at 12:15, only FIFTEEN MINUTES behind schedule! Wow! Of course the kids went straight to the basket of toys to play. We had a wonderful afternoon with Grandpa and everyone else that showed up to visit. How kind of our family to make the effort to come over when we were visiting on a work day when they had so many other things to do. It was great, so much laughing and story sharing and catching up. Eventually Archer and Shelly had to go outside to the swings which presented a bit of a problem. Did we bring snow pants? Nope. Did I notice the huge hole in Archer's jeans before we left the house? Nope. At least we had boots with us... They ventured out, Archer with a scarf tied around his knee to cover the hole in his jeans, and lasted longer than I expected. Aunt Patti follwed them out for pictures but David took pics from the window, we didn't feel like braving the snow.

We left Grandpa's house around 7:00 with the intention of going to Prairie du Chien but only made it as far as Platteville, it had been a long day and we checked into a hotel and got to sleep as quick as we could.

Self-Family-Portrait

Today we enjoyed a low-key Christmas Eve, went to church and came home all dressed up so naturally... we needed a family portrait. Break out the tripod, command everybody to smile and you get... not such great pics. Elijah was crying. Shelly wouldn't stand in her spot without hanging onto her brother (who kept pulling his arm away from her). And Archer took off running immediately following the picture. Or sometimes during the picture. Let's not exclude Mom and Dad from the problems - I don't know WHAT that look is on my face. And David's head was cut off. So, here they are, enjoy, laugh at us (we did!). And when you're ready for more bad family portraits, check out Awkward Family Photos.

Miracles

I watched a video of a newborn that had been placed on her mother's chest just moments after she was born. This baby then proceeded to move all by herself across her mother's chest and find food and begin eating. It took awhile. It was a slow process but with small pushes with her legs and arms she moved. She turned her head back and forth, pushed her way around and found her way to food. All without any adult putting her mouth directly in the spot it needed to go. It was amazing. Most babies could do this if given the chance. We assume they're completely helpless.

When I saw the video I was so awed by what God has done. Look what we miss just because we're in such a hurry to move things along on our schedule. What if we slowed down enough to learn what God has provided for us? What if we took the time to actually see the miracles all around us, every single day? What awesome things would we see? Would we be speechless, or too busy rushing on to the next thing to even notice?

The heavens declare the glory of God;
the skies proclaim the work of His hands.
~Psalm 19:1

Court

Shelly and Archer had a conflict that involved accusations and a ruined... "something." Of course the argument eventually devolved into "yes you DID!" and "no I DIDN'T!" So I convened court in the kitchen, commanded the kids to get chairs and took my place as the judge. I then instructed Shelly to tell me the story of what happened.

"Once upon a time, there was a little girl." Trying not to laugh, I told her she needs to tell me what happened to her thing that Archer ruined. "He RUINED it!" Well, what did he do to ruin it? Tear it? Cut it up? Set it on fire? She looked at me in bewilderment and said, "Why would he set it on fire?" Ugh. Let's try this again.

Archer, what's your defense to her accusations? "What's accusations?" Obviously our time in court didn't resolve the issue. But it did distract them from fighting with each other. And we even had a vocabulary lesson slipped in there without anyone noticing. So I'd say it was a success!

Court was followed by a story telling period where Archer told us about a little girl who somehow ended up in Antarctica with penguins, polar bears and snakes. You'll be relieved to know that the little girl did eventually make it home safely after a scary journey down a snow tunnel and a chase by the mamma polar bear.

Shelly: Mom can I help you? I'll do the taste test, ok?

How Are You Doing?

This is the question that everyone asks us, how are we adjusting to the new baby in the family? How are we doing? How are the kids? And the canned, standard answer is "oh, everything's great!" Its not, really, but we'll eventually figure it out. Right? It feels like a new baby in the house is a chance for me to start all over... start all over with the list of things I'm not doing "right" and the list of ways that I can screw up my baby's life. By giving him a pacifier or not, by letting him cry a little or rushing straight to him whenever he makes a peep, by... well, we all know the list. And the Mom Guilt that comes with the job. A guilt we feel just because we'll never be able to live up to some "standard" that's out there.

Add to that the dynamic of a household with other children who have their own feelings about the new baby. When someone asks Shelly what she thinks about her new brother and she says "he cries a lot" they laugh like its a cute little remark from a cute little girl. But underneath that, maybe what Shelly means is, "he cries a lot and then Mom holds him and she doesn't pick me up when I cry." And when we tell Archer that he's a good big brother but then when I leave the room he's taking out his frustrations on his sister by pushing or hitting her, what is he thinking and not saying? What kind of pressure are we putting on him to "perform" in his role and where is that leaving him? Things that in the past have been minor scuffles that they resolve themselves are now huge battles with screaming and physical retaliation. I'm making our house sound like a war zone and its not. We are doing "fine" but its a "fine" with new frustrations and we're working really hard to figure it out. And not screw up our kids permanently in the process.

Denise was encouraging me today and something she said was, it seems like a lot to adjust to but one day you'll wake up and realize that you've got it figured out, you've adjusted and things are going smoothly. And she's right, I think. One day we'll be able to get to the bus stop on time without it seeming like a miracle that we even got out of the house. One day it will take us less than forty minutes to get our coats on, get in the car and leave for church. But today, its a struggle. We're working on it. Trying to adjust. I just wish the adjusting part could be over soon, and we could have it figured out.

He said to them: "It is not for you to know the times or dates the Father has set by his own authority."
~Acts 1:7

And so we wait on His timing.

Tutu and Hot Pink Pants

Today Shelly is wearing a pastel pink ballerina tutu and hot pink corduroy pants. Its what she picked, we're not going anywhere, why fight it? I heard a big sigh from the kitchen and looked over to see her sitting at the table with her head in her hands. "What's wrong?" I asked her. Spread out on the table were papers, stickers, markers, scissors. "I just can't do all this work!" she said. She sounded exhausted from all her work. She decided to come over and sit next to me and take a rest. At 9:30.
She seems to be going through a period of extra clumsiness, or more likely needing extra attention. I hear "OWIE" about twenty times a day and then I'm expected to fuss over whatever body part has been "injured." I suspect these minor injuries would normally go completely unnoticed but right now she feels that she needs some extra loving. So I'm trying to give her more attention. But today I also tried to bribe her. "Shelly, if you go for the rest of the day without any more owies, then you can have a piece of candy." We'll see if that works. (Does that fall into the "creative parenting" category? Or is it "questionable parenting"?) In the mean time, I have to go play a game...

I've Told You a Thousand Times

For the past couple of weeks I've been yelling at Archer constantly. Everything is a yell. Because the kid has gone deaf and hears nothing I say. "What?" he says a hundred times a day. "PUT YOUR SHOES ON! WHERE'S YOUR HAT!! GO FIND YOUR BACKPACK!!!" He had a bad cold, still has it kind of. Because he doesn't blow his nose he's still stuffed up and his ears no longer work. When I get frustrated with him he says, "What? I have a bad ear!" That excuse will only last so long, and we're nearing the end of it.

Today when he got home from school I had forgotten to unlock the front door for him and as I ran to open it up he stood there pounding on the door and crying. When I opened it he fell inside crying, "My ears are so cold!" He forgot his hat at school and had to walk from the bus stop in 20 degree icy cold air. They were bright red. So now I'm wondering, will this cause him to remember his hat tomorrow, or do I let it happen again? Or do I now have to meet him at the bus stop every day with the car, so he doesn't have to walk home without a hat? I'd like to think he'll remember next time. But he's only six. Ugh, what's a mother to do?

Elijah: 1 Month

Yesterday Elijah turned one month. In his first month, our son has turned our household upside down and so much more. He's started grabbing onto things, he sometimes stays awake for a little while and he's definitely able to recognize people he knows. Happy one month birthday baby!

I Wish

Today Shelly let me hold her and dance in the kitchen. Usually she doesn't let me carry her around for long before she gets antsy and squirms out of my arms and then runs away. She's too busy to let Mom slow her down for long. She has to keep up with her brother. Today I held her and swayed slowly and rested my cheek on her cheek for two whole songs. We sang a little but mostly we were quiet. She just let me hold her.

I wonder if her willingness to stay close to me was related to her comment this morning: "Mom, I wish I was a baby. Like Eli." Probably. She sees me holding him constantly and maybe when I picked her up it was exactly what she needed at that moment. It was exactly what I needed, remembering when she was little like Eli and remembering that they grow away so fast. They get taller and suddenly I can't pick them up and they run off playing games or run up to me demanding that I chase after. But we don't get to cuddle much anymore.

Last night I went into Archer's room to give him a kiss after he'd fallen asleep and I kissed his head and then stood up and was startled to see the boy in the bed, arms and legs so long, face looking so much older. He's only six. But I still remember that little toddler face.

This One Time

This one time we were visiting Laurie and Dave, Shelly was little, only about two months old. How can a little person cause such a big mess? Every mom has at least one of these stories, a catastrophe at the time it happens but lots of laughs in the years to come. Shelly made a HUGE mess in her diaper, a mess that wasn't contained by the diaper but covered her entire back all the way up to her neck. My precious little girl, covered in... Well, what made the whole thing worse was that Laurie and Dave's water heater had just gone out. And maybe I had run out of wipes or something, because my memory of that atomic mess was Mom helping me try to clean up Shelly with cold water and paper towels. And I just kept saying to Mom, "Just cut the shirt off of her. Just get a pair of scissors and we'll cut it off so we don't have to pull it over her head."

Today Elijah had his first one of those, a mess that covered his leg all the way to his toes. Thankfully we were at home. I made a mental note to get extra clothes in the diaper bag. Because walking around without an extra outfit is just asking for trouble...