Evidence

Tonight Shelly came to me with a small toy held gently between her fingers. As I was trying to clean the kitchen, cook supper, help Archer with homework and not trip over backpacks and school papers strewn everywhere... Shelly came to me with this tiny thing, with a sad look in her eyes. "Its why I don't like to leave my door open. Because E comes in and he takes stuff out that I didn't take out and then he leaves it on the floor and he messes up my room." Every day she closes her bedroom door. Every day after she leaves for school I open it to air it out, let it warm up (the vents don't work right and her room is always too cold). And sometimes E finds his way in there to explore the toys and treasures.

I tried to find a moment of peace among all the clutter surrounding me in that kitchen, the food needing attention, the older brother calling out another math question. I knelt down in front of her and told her that when friends and guests come over, sometimes they pull things out, move our things around. We don't get upset, we share, we put it away after they leave. I told a story about how when I had kids, and they came into this house to live with me, they moved my things around, left their own things in my way, but that's part of being a family. Being nice, living together, not getting too upset when our things are moved. And she can do this with her brother. And as I said it to her, and looked at her backpack on the floor instead of haning on its hook, looked at the piles of her schoolwork on the counter, I thought, this is just life, just real life, where people put their stuff in your space. Move  your stuff around without your permission. And we just keep moving around each other, hugs as we pass, putting things away once again, that's the rythm of our lives. And I wouldn't trade it for anything, my things being disorganized by a busy toddler, my bedroom being overrun with toys and homework, my car littered with more of the same. I wouldn't trade it. It drives me a bit crazy sometimes, but when I really think about it, I wouldn't give up the evidence of their lives here with me. Its a picture of family, and what we leave in our wake.

Our Anthem

Think of Queen, think "We will, we will.. ROCK YOU!"
Got the tune in your head? Here we go!

Got butter on your face.
Big disgrace.
Sticky syrup all over the place.

We will, we will WASH YOU!

Inspired by breakfast with pancakes and plenty of, you guessed it, sticky syrup. You just never know where a meal will take you. We all walked out of the restaurant humming, and laughing over our lyrics. Cause we're so funny, right? Yeah we are!

(Thanks to David for making cleaning up just a bit more fun.)

A Day in the Life - Spring Break

Breakfast

Helping with laundry

Cowboy lunch

"Hud! Hud!" (Translation, Hug! Hug!)

Playing with Archer's Pez dispenser, after snatching it from Archer's hand and running away, declaring "Mine!"

Arts and craft time while E took his nap - Shelly colored and Archer built a plane.

Studying the paper airplane book after supper.

Elijah doing dishes (AKA playing in the water and making a huge mess everywhere, but he was occupied and happy so it's worth water all over).

Testing out the paper airplanes.

Bed time means run and hide from Mom, E tried really hard to hide under the dining room table but couldn't keep himself from giggling so I was able to track him down and drag him out.

All in all it was an uneventful but fun-filled day. No major arguments/whining/complaints. The kids spent the entire day in their jammies. We got the bedrooms cleaned up a little bit. That's a successful day, as far as I'm concerned! 

For more of what we did today (yes, there's more!) visit the kids' blogs (yes they have blogs now!).

Shelly's Famous Art

Dancing and singing with Shelly

Testing the airplane with Archer

My Superpower

Today I discovered my superpower. Or one of them, anyway. Prioitize.

Shelly was not feeling well, I picked her up from school and she spend the afternoon in my bed watching cartoons and defending herself from E climbing all over her. She asked constantly, "When will Archer be home? Its no fun being sick." She need her playmate. Finally he came home. But stayed outside. And when I told her she wasn't allowed to play outside, because she was sick, she cried long and loud. I powered through. Don't give in on this one, she's sick. Make her stay inside. She thought she was feeling better. But then she couldn't eat supper.

We retreated to my room again and as Archer worked on his homework she again tried to rest while the toddler climbed all over her. Suddenly she started crying, writhing in pain, and I didn't know if he'd attacked her or what. Except... She sat up and projectile vomited ALL OVER MY BED. And her brother. More crying and yelling ensued, and I kicked into my super power mode. Prioritize.

"Get him off the bed!" I told Arch, pointing at E, I picked up Shell and rushed her to the bathroom and sat her down next to the toilet. I ran back to my bed, hoping to clear it off before anything sank in too deep. E still crying, now wandering around saying his version of "towel." (Sounds a lot like "owl" actually.) Shelly crying over the toilet. Archer searching out a towel for his little brother and me rolling up sheets, blankets, unfolded-previously-clean laundry into a big bundle to deal with later. Throwing pillows to the side to try to spare more damage. And now back to the bathroom. Put Shelly's hair up so its not hanging into the toilet. Find some more towels. Strip her down and stick her in the tub for a bath.

And finally, after it had all settled down again, I realized what I had done. It didn't overwhelm me or surprise me, what had happened. It wasn't unexpected and although it was messy, it didn't bother me TOO much. (I did have a gag reflex at one point, can't deny that, the mess just about sent me over the top.) But, in a past life, its something that would have sent me into a spiral of "what next?" and "who can fix this?" That past life of no kids and not knowing ANYTHING. Prioritize. I don't want the puke to soak into my mattress. The toddler was a little messy, but the big brother can help him. And Shelly was crying but not puking anymore.

I seriously felt like a super hero for not having a meltdown. And THAT'S what motherhood has done to me. And THAT'S what God has done in my life. When I pray, He answers. The dumbest little things - "Lord, there's not enough time in the day." And then He answers, things get done, there wasn't as much work as I had thought. Or the mess wasn't quite as messy and I had expected. And He's been teaching me to let go of my "schedule" and let life happen. Archer went to bed almost two hours behind schedule tonight. And it didn't really bother me. Its something I would have been so anxious about in the past. But I'm working though that. GOD is working me through that. There are so many ways He can make things better for us, if we just listen. Big things, little things, just slow down and hear. And that's the REAL superpower. God.

(I prayed at supper tonight, "Help us get our work and chores done that need to be done tonight. Help us know what to do next." Not kidding. An hour later He showed up with a little challenge for us all!)

Blessings Every Day

Some days I wish I could have the kids clean the kitchen floor Pippi Longstocking Style, with brushes attached to their feet and skating around in joy.

Some days I wish that I didn't have a little helper unfolding the laundry as fast as I fold it.

Some days the laundry and dishes pile up to seemingly insurmountable heights.

Every day, I'm glad to have my little helpers at my elbows, tossing laundry into the washing machine or dryer for me, dropping crumbs faster than I can sweep them up, and trying so hard to learn to do what I do. Trying to just be close.

Shelly sometimes follows behind me like a shadow while she waits for me to finish a task before I help her with something. I saw Eli grabbing her shirt and pulling her backwards as fast as his chubby little legs would let him walk back. Then pushing her forward again with all his might.

Archer's gotten into the habit of freeing Elijah from his crib in the morning, allowing E to roam in to me so I don't have to go retrieve him myself, I can stay in my comfy warm bed and just snuggle the baby in with me when he arrives.

These children of mine, these beautiful little chaos makers, destroyers of organized closets, these precious little students who work so hard to learn each and every thing that happens around them, these amazing miracles in my life. I can hardly finish being frustrated about the new mess before I turn back to God thanking him for what countless blessings he has showered upon me. I surely do not deserve any of it. And yet, in his grace, he shares more.

Marker Fun

Dray erase marker in the hands of a very small child, could have been a very big problem.


Fortunately, he only colored 2 things.
1. His left hand.
2. The sliding door window.

Both easily washed off. Did I mention that when I found him playing quietly on his own, he took one look at me, then made a surprised face, his mouth in a big open "O!" and his hand over his mouth? Hard to be mad at a cutie like that!

What If...

What if you're making barbeque sauce from scratch, and at the very end you put it in the blender to puree the onions and garlic so its just a nice smooth sauce and then... What if the blender starts making a high-pitched noise and smoke comes out of the bottom? Obviously I turned it off and unplugged it right away, but can I ever use it again? Just wait for it to cool off (for a day or two), or do I have to throw it out? I guess I know what I want for Christmas this year. A blender that can withstand my Freezer Experiments.

Oh wait, you haven't heard? A Freezer Experiment... A little term that David and I use to describe a project in the kitchen that causes a big mess with doubtful results. As in, I'm trying a new recipe, making a big mess, and really not sure its going to be edible. The origins of this term go back to long long ago, maybe even before David and I had kids. Before we could comprehend how something like this was even possible. How could you leave a young child alone long enough for this to happen? We walked into Scott's house where Heidi was babysitting Nick and Christopher. Nick was... three? I don't know, little, but big enough to do some serious damage. He was mixing flour and whatever else he could find, and he called this concotion his Freezer Experiment. Heidi was in another room, unaware. The biggest problem with Nick's experiment was its location. The kitchen sink. What David and I didn't realize at the time was that Nick was actually washing the whole mess down the drain. And as we all know, large amounts of flour with a little (or a lot) of water cause a big, gooey, sticky BLOB. Inside the pipes. So when David and I brought this up recently at a family gathering, and we were laughing at the memory of cute little Nicholas making a big mess in the kitchen, Scott did not have such a fond memory. He, of course, was the one who had to deal with the aftermath. (For the record, I have since been educated on how that sort of thing could happen. I no longer think to myself, "I would never let my kid do THAT!" Because I probably already DID let my kid do that.)

So, back to the Freezer Experiment of the day. Barbeque sauce. A burned out blender. And the question... should I try using that same blender again? Or is it too much of a fire hazard now?

Typical Mom Morning

This morning I took Arch to the bus stop because its raining. On the short drive home I formulated a little fantasy about coming inside, laying down on the couch and going back to sleep while Shell and E played quietly together. That little fantasy ended the moment I walked in the door. As I was taking off my shoes I realized the bottoms of my pants were wet from walking outside, then I stepped in a cold puddle with my socks and David announced Shelly needed help in the bathroom. No time for changing wet socks or pants. As I gave her a bath, and then E, I noticed the bathroom floor was wet. Puddles everywhere. Front door, bathroom, bedroom. Baby spit up in my bed. My pants legs are still wet...

I've been thinking about how I'd be more efficient and accomplish more if I had a schedule. (I don't even know what I mean when I say "accomplish more," more what?) Then I start thinking about how there are so many variables that there's just no way to schedule most things. Laundry on Mondays. Mopping on Tuesdays. Whatever. I'm back in fantasy land. The minute I try to plan something like that, a kid gets the flu and we're doing laundry around the clock to disinfect everything. Too many variables. Puddles everywhere. Today's mopping day. And laundry. No naps for me, we've got work to do!

Today we were at Mom and Dad's (surprise! aren't we ALWAYS there???) and though I hadn't planned on staying for supper, it smelled so good, Mom told us to stay, and so we did. I noticed some lightning outside and a severe thunderstorm warning for our county on the tv but didn't pay much attention. The garden could use the water. Yummy supper, then we left. We watched lightning in front of us the whole drive home and on the last leg I started noticing leaves and small branches everywhere, then a police officer in the road moving bigger branches and a very large branch hanging from the power line that crossed the road in front of us. He waved me through, it didn't look safe to me but we prayed and drove under and thanked the Lord for his protection. I'm glad I wasn't driving in the storm that caused THAT, I thought. Just a little further another police car, more flares in the road but this time it wasn't a branch, it was an entire tree leaning on the power lines that run next to the road. Oh Lord! We prayed and thanked God for his protection and asked him to protect those who had to fix it.

We got home and thanked God for brining us safely home and protecting us on the way. So when Archer discovered that our umbrella had blown over, broken in half, smashed our garden, I reminded myself to be thankful that it wasn't worse. But I was a little upset. But still praising God for his grace and protection.

A broken umbrella and flattened bean plants were the worst thing that happened to us today, and for that I'm praising the Lord. Thank You!!!

Worship the Lord with gladness;
come before him with joyful songs.
~Psalm 100:2

Today's Promise

I recently read in another mom's blog that "Your best is good enough." God will fill in the gaps left by our imperfect efforts. I really needed to hear it, I usually feel so inadequate as a mom to my kids. I constantly question whether I'm good enough. The truth, of course - I'm not. None of us are. We can't be good enough. But all we need to do is ask, and God fills in the gaps, his grace covers over our weakness and sin. I've been asking a lot of him lately. "Help me please!" I cry out, and this week, I've seen the fruits. There have been many moments this week where its been so obvious, so clear that his hand was at work and maybe no one else noticed, maybe it wasn't a big deal to them. But to me, they were like rainbows, moments when God reminded me of his promise to help, to fill in the gaps, to fill us up with grace.

One of the kids lied to me about something little, but its an ongoing problem, this truth-telling issue, and I nearly over-reacted. Big lecture, big punishment, I don't know what. But I've been asking the Lord to help me slow down, "Please, God, remind me to ask you first before I say something I'll regret." And I did, I just kept my mouth shut, said a prayer, and something someone else had told me popped into my head. It was so simple, and yet not something I had tried before. So we tried it. I felt much better about that than how I've handled it before. Maybe I'll write more on that some other time.

Between Monday and Tuesday, around 1:30 in the morning, I looked around my living room and felt so dissatisfied with our home. I'm just unhappy with it. I love our home, its the perfect size for us and I know this is where God wants us to be. But the clutter. Laundry. Dishes. Why can't I keep up? I didn't even know WHAT to pray, other than, "Please help me!" I finished folding laundry and went to bed. So tired, I just want a rest. On Tuesday afternoon I was able to take a nap for an hour and after I got up the baby stayed asleep so I could get more done. He's been doing that lately, taking naps without me holding him. I know that's something that many other babies do, sleep without being within six inches of their mothers, but for E this is a new development. And every time he does it I thank God for the chance to play with the other two, or fold some more laundry, or whatever. Thank you Lord, for my nap, and for the baby taking naps.

There was one day thrown in there where the four of us just laughed all day long together. I don't know why, or what we were doing, but it seemed like every five minutes there was another excuse to laugh and we just smiled and laughed with each other through the whole day. We got to the end of the day and when David got home I couldn't tell him the silly things we said or did but I reported on our great day together. Just laughing. It felt so good, more refreshing than any nap could be!

Fast forward to today. We had plans to go with friends up to Mom and Dad's for some pool time but the weather didn't cooperate. They came over for playtime instead and I worked on little chores while the five kids (plus baby) all played together. I went outside to check the garden and spotted it - a rainbow. A reminder of God's promise. He won't flood the earth again, the way he did in Noah's time. But that clear, bright rainbow reminded me of his other promise, to fill us up with grace and love, to provide what we need. I went back inside smiling and realized something. There was NO LAUNDRY to wash, fold, put away. The dishes were all clean and back in the cupboards. I sat down on the floor with the four boys, my two plus two friends, and played Legos with them. I tried to figure out how it had all gotten done, and we'd still had time to laugh and play together. I couldn't work out the number of hours in the day, minus the playtime, minus the work load... it seemed like there wasn't enough time to have fit it all in. Somehow it worked, though. The girls came to play with us and I told the boys that these Legos had been mine when I was a kid. They were shocked. A girl playing with legos? We laughed and played and I praised God in my heart for filling the gaps, making it all work, and giving us rainbows in the sky to remind us of his great promise of redemption and grace.

Lord, I wait for you; you will answer, Lord my God.
~ Psalm 38:15

Honeymoon is Over

In two days David and I will celebrate our eigth anniversary. And the honeymoon is over, as evidinced by our little conversation this afternoon. We were in separate parts of the house doing our own things, me going through pictures on the computer and David rummaging around in the basement. I passed the steps and called down, "Do you need help?" "No!" I heard, so went on my way, back to the computer, with Eli sitting on the floor next to me. As I worked on whatever thing I was doing at the moment I heard a loud noise come out of Eli and looked at him to see that he was also looking around, also a little startled by the noise. Guess I'd better change him, I thought, and scooped him up. When I went into the other room I found David with crib pieces all around him, in the process of constructing the crib for the third time in our lives. "Do you need help?" I again asked. "Nope!" Fine.

Then I laid the baby on the changing table and discovered the front of my shirt was full of s.... stuff. I immediately started groaning and loudly complaining about my lot in life, how awful everything was and wouldn't it be nice to have some help? OOOHHHH poor me, I groaned. The s.... STUFF was all over Eli's leg, and then he waved his arms around and it was on his hand and arm, and then his hand headed toward his face... "NO!" I nearly shouted, grabbing his arm and now MY hand was... well, you get the idea. So as I attempted to undress him without spreading the mess any further I continued my moaning, which was met with smiles from the baby and complete indifference from my wonderful husband. "I asked YOU if YOU needed help," I prompted. "And I said no thanks," he replied. He wouldn't ask me if I wanted help. "Oh I don't want my beautiful wife to get her hands dirty, surely I'll rush to her side to offer my assistance!" I said to him. He wouldn't budge, he was busy with the tools. He had the nerve to make some comment about being busy with a man's work. "This is all going in the blog," I warned, but he kept up with his little comments and excuses why he wouldn't help me. "I turned down your help, I know you'd turn me down so I don't even need to ask if you want my help," he said.

Finally I had the baby undressed and took him to the bathroom to hose him off. Finally I escaped my husband's indifference and went off to laugh about the whole thing while E splashed around in the water. Honeymoon's over, I thought to myself, but somehow this feels like just the beginning. I guess eight years is a long time but its flown by, it somehow feels like just the beginning of our story, there's so much more to come. And if we can laugh off a mess like the one we had tonight, well, we'll be ok for the years to come, right?

P.S. Thanks, David, for setting up the crib (aka Baby Cage, according to Shelly). We'll get that baby out of our bed soon, or eventually!

No Time for Sleeping

Today was sooo busy. Sooo fun! First the boat, then some time in the sand, then back to the pool. That wasn't enough fun, though, I promised the kids something REALLY BIG when we got home. David's coming home from a few days in California and I needed big help getting the house in shape in time for his return. So I made a big promise, one that was so big that the kids worked for two hours straight with smiles on their faces just cheerfully looking forward to earning the prize. The Prize: They would be allowed to stay up AS LATE AS THEY WANTED.

Oh it was so simple, genius really, and it worked. They worked. They truly earned it. As a bonus, not only did they get to stay up late, we brought their sleeping bags into the living room for a slumber party. And had popcorn. In the middle of the night. I really thought they'd both fall asleep half way through the movie we put on, after all, we had SUCH a busy day already, surely they must be tired! But the sheer joy of getting to stay up, having no one tell them what time to go to bed, kept them going until ONE A.M.! Whew! Now its 4:30 a.m. and approaching the time I need to pile everyone into the car to go pick up David. I wonder what Thursday in our house is going to look like with this strange little schedule we've had over the last few hours. Only time will tell!

Windmill Challenge

Trying to feed Eli baby food is similar to trying to putt a golf ball past a windmill. Only harder, because at least the windmill is predictable. E's arms flapping around are completely unpredictable, and add to that the moving target (his mouth) and its a recipe for a mess. Considering it was her first attempt at this challenge, Shelly did surprisingly well at getting most of the squash into his mouth. No clothes on the baby made for a quick clean up, now we're on to graham crackers and bath time!
(As I type this Elijah is leaning forward and trying to suck on my knee. I'm really nervous that his one little tooth is going to get hold of something and do some damage, look out, world, we've got a carnivore on our hands!)

Waffles and More

A few weeks ago we started feeding E little bits of food. Some things have had success, others have caused catastrophic projectile vomiting. Just ask Denise and Dan, they got to witness the consequence of feeding a little bit of chicken to a baby whose tummy was full of milk. He gagged it down but then, just when I thought we were safe, it all came up, chicken and more. And more. Anyway, so far we've had lots of success with avacado, cheerios, and waffles. Yep, the boy likes his waffles. Most of it just get shredded but some gets eaten and he likes eating/playing with it. And most importantly - it keeps him occupied for a few minutes so I can eat my food. Of course I pay for the peace, it makes a HUGE mess which is impossible to sweep up (soggy waffle crumbs, anyone?). But its worth it.

Recognition

Today we had Miss C, Miss A, Archer, Shelly and Elijah all home with me. It was a day full of fun and when it was all over I was a little worn out. But I was on a mission, the kids' rooms needed a SERIOUS cleaning and as I sat on the floor in Arch's room putting together a puzzle, he said something amazing to me. "Mom babysat kids today and tonight we're having a sleepover so she has a LOT of work to do. So she's going to need a lot of help." I melted right then and there. Aww, Archer, you're my hero today!!! And then he helped me. For ten minutes. Then he got distracted and moved on to other things.

Now for round two, a sleepover tonight and more babysitting tomorrow. Deep breath, ready, set, GO!

Mama's Best Friend

Today my best friend is this dear laundry stain treater. We have many bottles. We keep them throughout the house to attack the stains at the moment they occur. Mama's other best friend is dark colored clothes. They reduce the need for Mama's first best friend, the laundry stain treater.

Just Another Day

Yesterday when we got home from church I stayed outside to enjoy the warm weather and scrape ice off the driveway. (Hey, 30° felt like a heat wave after all the arctic weather we've had!) After I'd been out for awhile, David stuck his head out the door and shouted, "Amy! Help!" So of course I went in and casually started taking my shoes off. No baby crying, that's kinda nice. But what? Archer crying? It didn't really sound like a hurt cry, but I thought I heard David say the word "hospital" while he was talking to Arch in the other room. Oh, I thought, I wonder if we have the cash to pay the emergency room co-pay, or if they'll bill us? I'm sure David will take Archer in, since it wouldn't make sense for all of us to trek over there just to sit around. I hope there's no blood on the carpet. Oh yeah, also I hope Archer's not hurt TOO badly. (Notice how I'm not even worked up about this? How I'm just sort of thinking through how the rest of the day's plans will go? Is this really what its come to? Too many trips to the ER to get overly excited about it, I guess.)

Imagine my surprise when I finally got my shoes off and walked into the living room to see an Archer that was NOT at ALL hurt. Well, the crying didn't really sound like a "hurt" cry anyway. He'd broken the lamp. He was more upset than we were, after all, nobody was hurt. And it was an accident. (Or so he said.) After about an hour of clean up (the glass was EVERYWHERE, embedded in the carpet and furniture) we had pancakes and all was well. Just another day in paradise. The end.

Just get a hose...

Remember this scene from the movie Mr. Mom?

That's been my morning. Except my gloves are pink. Enough said.

Let's Make a Deal

E has a little cough and some serious nasal congestion. He sounds like a Snuffleufagus. Or what I imagine a Snuffleufagus would sound like. S has a serious cough. And A, well we already know what he has. Fever. Vomit. Yuck. Stay away from us and we'll stay away from you.

Now if I could just keep the kids away from each other to avoid spreading each other's sickness back and forth.

Peace and Quiet and...

Around 2:30 today I received a phone call: "Archer complained that his tummy is upset and he has a temperature of 100.2. He needs to go home." So I immediately packed up the other two, brought Archer home and put him to sleep on the couch. He slept for a couple hours and then said he'd eat some soup if I made it. Once it was ready he said he couldn't eat it. Oh well. Back to sleep. I enjoyed the unusual level of quiet, no running and yelling and rough housing. I felt a little guilty for enjoying the peace when it was at my sick son's expense. But mostly I just enjoyed it.

A couple hours later when I made a grilled cheese sandwich for Shelly, Archer said he'd eat one too. He came to the table. I asked him if he could eat it, he said, "I don't know," and immediately threw up on the table. Guess he won't eat it. And the price to pay for the peace and quiet is cleaning up the puke. There's always the trade off. Always.