Cousins, Friends

Today I went to Heidi's house to pick up the kids and witnessed Shelly fighting with Brock, only 3 months older than her and an inch taller. There was no way she was going to share the little scooter with him. And then, as I was saying "Shelly, don't push Brock!" I heard another voice. "You're not my cousin anymore! You're not my friend!" Archer was arguing with Annika about something and they were both saying this to each other. "Archer, that's not nice!" I tried to tell him but he wouldn't listen. They fight like siblings because they spend so much time together. But less than five minutes later, when we were in the car driving home, there came a voice from the back seat. "I miss Annika. Annika's my friend and I miss her so much." I asked him, "I thought you didn't like her?" And his simple reply... "But I love her. And I miss her! She's my friend."

That's the blessing of family, I guess. You're friends, and even if you decide not to be friends, you're still cousins. You still see each other and have the chance to be friends again.

Good Earth by Pearl S Buck

This is an amazing story, full of drama and heartache and all the joys that come to us in life. It was not written to be entertaining or glorifying. It was simply but beautifully written to capture the mundane daily life that we all face and in the daily struggles the sorrows and joys that find their way to us as well.

The farmer starts his life with only a small portion of land, hardly enough to feed himself and aging father. He takes a wife who works in silence and loyalty by his side and the earth feeds them but starves them as well. Over time the wife provides three sons and two daughters to her husband and still works by his side, and leaves the land with him when famine strikes. Yet this farmer yearns for his land and finds his way back, always thinking of the future and prosperity. He is frugal and invests every extra piece of silver into more land, he buys land from the rich family that lives in the big house in town. They are selling their land as they spend their wealth carelessly and need to fund their opium habit and rich blood. He buys enough land that he must hire laborers to cultivate the fields and finally, when they’ve outgrown their home and they’ve become wealthy enough to survive any famine or flood, the family moves to town. They rent their land to other farmers and gather their share of the harvest and the profits and live in the big house in town. The rich family has all moved away and the farmer now rents the home, filling the rooms with his children, grandchildren, and servants. Through everything he seeks peace in his home, he finds wives for his sons and servants to care for them. And though he fixes the problems as they come along, still he cannot find peace as he is plagued by more unrest within his household.

Through his entire life the farmer hungers for his land, plans his sons’ futures to reap the rich harvests from the land and to bring them prosperity and peace. And yet, his sons are of another mind, they have their own plans and dreams, they do not understand their father’s desperate need to cling to every bit of earth that he owns. He urges them to never sell the land, to hold it and ensure their own prosperity but they do not understand the ranting of the old man. In his last days they make their plans to sell the land and divide the money. They do not see their folly, nor realize they are following the same crooked road of the family that lived in the big house before. They do not understand the hardships that the farmer endured to build the prosperity of his family, and they do not realize his sacrifices to give to them what they now spend so freely.

He planned their lives for them but they rejected his plans. He purchased and held the land for them and all they could think of was to sell it. He planned these things to provide the best lives possible for his children and grandchildren and they could not recognize his wisdom and intentions. This is the tragedy that families face, the parents' intentions to guide their children into a better life clash with the children’s will to follow their own paths, and seek a better life in their own way.

What are my intentions for my children? Will they follow or will they go their own way? Will they see the lessons I've learned from the struggles I've experienced, or will they view it at rantings of their old mom, out of touch? Generation after generation we move forward but backward also. Where will we end up?

Wound Up

Archer is SO wound up today, he's wearing only a pullup and socks, he refuses to get dressed. He's running around, screaming, taking a 30 second break to watch what's on t.v., making a train that's about 20 cars long, screaming that Shelly took ONE car from the long train, running up and down the stairs...

And Shelly's taking her cues from Brother Bear, his energy feeds her, she's chasing after him, or running away from him (depending on the balance of power with who has more train cars), shouting, wearing my underwear on her head (she pulls them from my drawer and then walks around wearing them like a necklace), crying "owie" every time I don't pick her up... She now brings me the little elastics for pony tails and hands them to me, turns around, and stands in front of me, waiting for me to put them in her hair. Then she laughs and reaches up to feel the little sprout of hair sticking straight up.

I've noticed that Shell completely depends on her older brother for cues on how to react to everything. If he runs around screaming when I turn on the vacuum, she thinks there's something to be afraid of and runs away from me, climbs onto a chair and watches from afar. When she's around a crowd she doesn't know, she chases after him, as long as he's happy and she can see him, she's happy too. When he's shy, cautious, upset, she responds in the same way.

Archer, for his part, is a social butterfly, running around to talk to everyone, completely unaware of his sister's need to stay close to him. The kid is almost four years old and he's ready to take on the world. But first, he needs to conquor his parents.

The daily struggle for power in our house is easing a little bit but not a single day goes by without him testing something. And in this, too, Shelly is following her brother's lead, little complaints because she wanted a cracker not a carrot (she takes the food from me and defiantly throws it on the floor), or she doesn't want to go to bed yet, or he has the toy that she really wanted. The lesson of sharing will go on for the next 15 years at least, and this I know from personal experience. Maybe not toys, but sharing space, sharing time, sharing...

And on another note, as adults, we could probably still do a little better with sharing... David, you know what I'm talking about... SHARE your DESSERT for goodness sake!

Scholar

My son found his dad's glasses this morning and walked around the house saying "I'm David!" The sad thing is that I'm afraid he's going to need glasses, and it won't be too long, either. David got his first pair in fourth grade, I was in fifth or sixth when I got mine. So, if you average that out, our kids are doomed for glasses around fifth grade. (Doesn't he look cute, though?) Sorry kids!

Na na na na na POT PIE!

Thanks once again to Mom and Dad for taking the kids overnight. David and I had a great date night.

And now, for pictures from Pot Pie Day. Thanks Denise and Danielle for coming along and going along with the apron idea, and thanks Mom for hosting! They're tasty and I'm glad we had the chance to cook them together. Archer's been talking about it since we made them and probably won't quit talking about it until they're all gone!

Orange Crush

Shelly says my name, "Mama," but only when she wants something from me. Otherwise, she pretends like she doesn't know how. Its a good way for her to get what she wants, I guess. When she says Mama I'm so happy I'll give her anything. Ice cream, crackers, a bottle of Orange Crush. And speaking of which...
David brought home an extra special treat, a six pack of Orange Crush soda in glass bottles. A novelty, that's for sure. So we, the two parents, have been talking up the popcorn and movie night when we can break out the Orange Crush and have a real party. Then, one night when David was working late, I decided I was tired of waiting for popcorn and movie night, and it was time for the Orange Crush.

First, I had to convince Archer. "Archer, let's have an Orange Crush, you know, the soda in the bottles." But he had been listening carefully and was prepared to hold me to my word, "No, that's for popcorn and movie night! And Dad's not home!" I managed to talk him into it, he brought a bottle over to me and then I opened it up. But before I let him take the first sip, I said "Now, this is a very special moment. Its your first time drinking it, so you have to remember it forever." "Ok ok," he said to me, eager to just TRY it and get done with all the talking. "It tastes dreamy," I told him. Now, keep in mind I'm not a huge lover of orange soda, its just the first time Archer has had it. So I wanted it to be a big deal for him.

He took his first sip, I watched his face, and then... "Its not dreamy," he said to me. Once again, I was reminded that something which is a big deal for me may mean absolutely nothing to him. Its all a matter of chance.

Growing up

Today I registered Archer for Four Year Old Kindergarden. After I was done with all the paperwork I handed it over and the person behind the desk said to me "you'll need to make sure he gets his next immunizations when he turns five." I was confused for a second, because he's completely up to date on everything, and he's not even four, why was she telling me what to do when he's five? Then I realized. "He's going into four year kindergarden." "Oh," she said, "he's just so verbal and clear. I didn't think he could only be four." What a compliment! I'll take what I can get!

Little Monkey

This is my little monkey who now climbs over the baby gate. What are we going to do with that kid?

Fashion Baby!

Grandma Sue just COULDN'T wait ANY LONGER, and this is the result...
Although its completely ridiculous, I have to admit, its really cute too.






On another note, she's still a dancing baby. And, when she tries to shake her head "no" most of the time she just ends up swaying back and forth. She's getting closer, but doesn't quite have it down yet.

P.S.

Tonight I got some really great action shots of Archer hugging his baby sister, while she tried to shove him away. And then I realized... no memory card in the camera. $@&# TECHNOLOGY!